SarcasticCupcake5

“Drop it! Drop. It. Bad, Lulu!” Ethan wrestled the cloth grocery bag away from the cocker spaniel. “I am so sorry.” He apologized, hoisting Lulu into his arms and away from the woman’s bag. “It’s really irresponsible to own a dog if you aren’t willing to train it.” She scowled. “She is trained.” Ethan shot Lulu a look. He hurried her down the street, away from the agitated stranger. “I don’t know what’s gotten into you lately.” Ethan whispered. “But you’ve gotta knock it off.” Lulu yipped and tried to free herself from Ethan’s arms. “You’re staying right there until I get you to the dog park. Apparently, I can’t trust you to walk on your own any more.” Ethan hadn’t been able to trust her much at all the last few weeks. Lulu had started barking a lot more and she’d chewed up several pairs of shoes and the arm of their couch. She refused to eat certain foods and god forbid if she wanted to go outside and you weren’t ready. Clara didn’t have the time or energy to deal with her. Their

“Nnn. Pfffff. Oof.” Clara sighed. “Lulu, can you please grab that laptop charger for me?” The cocker spaniel stared up at her. “The charger. For my laptop. Please, girl.” Clara leaned over again, bracing the laptop against her stomach and tried snagging the cord between her outstretched fingers. The cord slipped off her finger and flipped over, making it further out of her reach than it had been. “That’s okay, I didn’t want to get any work done today.” Lulu yipped and wagged tail eagerly. “How about you go look out the window for Ethan?” Clara suggested. The spaniel understood that, apparently, because she immediately trotted over to the window bench and nudged the blinds up. Clara had texted Ethan, asking him to pick up some dinner on his way home. He had responded with a simple thumbs up, but now he was nowhere to be found. Originally, the idea was for him to pick up weekends shifts to help cover the cost of the remaining baby items they needed to buy. But Clara felt like he was

Azena awoke to a mysterious sound, not unlike pots and pans being slammed together. She threw her blanket aside and padded out to the living room. “Talk about a role reversal.” She muttered. “Hmm?” Xio glanced up at her, but didn’t stop hammering. Azena looked across the trashed living room. This must be how Xio felt when she destroyed her study right after he cleaned it. Then she realized, no, it wasn’t trashed just very full. She rubbed her eyes. “What is all of this?” “The new table, the new couch, and our new, modern cooking appliances.” “You went out and bought all of this by,” She glanced at the wall clock. “Nine a.m.?” Xio turned up his nose. “I made the table. I bought everything else.” “I think that’s worse, actually.” Azena stepped over and checked out the new cookware. Xio had bought a blender, a coffee maker, a knife set, a casserole dish, and a tin for cupcakes or muffins. They were sitting atop a completely new table that seemed really nice for something he had made

Time was flying fast. When Clara’s mom had first mentioned setting up her baby shower, her immediate thought was ‘it’s too soon’. But before she knew it, they were only five weeks out from her due date. So she agreed to do it now. They essentially kicked her out of the conversation after that. It always made her anxious when her sisters and aunts got together to do anything without her. Not to mention there was an elephant in the room. When the conversation of her impending shower came up, she used it was a chance to talk to Ethan. “I’m going to invite your mom, is that okay?” She asked as she pushed the shopping cart along. “I’m not the boss of you.” Ethan said. “You can invite whoever you want.” “Hmm.” Clara poked his pouty lips. “You say that and yet you look like you disapprove.” “It’s your party. If you think that my mom is somehow going to be a good addition to your roster, go for it.” “I don’t want to upset you though.” “I’m not upset.” Ethan insisted. “Just don’t expect to be

“Alright, now go long.” Ethan said. He threw the rope toy over his head and Lulu chased after it. The toy soared into the hallway and an excited Lulu nearly collided with Clara as she caught it. “I thought you were up here putting the laundry away.” Clara said. Lulu ran back to Ethan with the rope in her mouth. “I was, but Lulu distracted me.” “Come on, Lulu. Let Ethan finish his chores. You and I can play.” The spaniel looked back and forth between the two humans. Ethan ruffled her head. “Go on, I have shirts to hang.” Clara took the rope from Lulu’s mouth and tossed it down the hallway. “So uh I actually came up here to talk to you.” “Okay.” Ethan picked up a bath towel and started folding it. “I just don’t want you to be upset with me.” “Didn’t we already have this conversation?” Ethan said. “You can’t be pregnant again, you haven’t had the first one yet.” “No.” Clara smiled weakly. Lulu came back with the rope and Clara tossed it again. “Uh, so your mom found me on social media.

It had taken a week or so after their dinner with Patty for Ethan to return to normal. Clara had mixed feelings about Patty. She believed Patty loves Ethan, but Clara did see how she could be a little… much. And if she honestly bothers him that much, maybe it was for the best to keep her out. They did not have a proper discussion on it, they just moved on. Clara spent the weekend going through house listings nearby. The market was crazy. She could probably sell her townhouse super fast, but it would be next to impossible to buy a decent house. Everything was selling for higher than listing. She had bookmarked a few things to show Ethan and they were pending by the next morning. The possibility of being technically homeless and having to move while pregnant did not appeal to her. So they had agreed to stay put at least until the baby arrived. It would give Ethan more time to job hunt. “I have a surprise for you.” Ethan said as he came in the door. He carried in a heavy looking paper

Clara responded to yet another text, then shut her phone off for the night. Her family had really been blowing up her phone since she’d finally told them about the baby. If she thought they had been excited about the wedding, the baby news gathered at least twice the response. She hadn’t bothered telling her work yet, because she knew her bosses there wouldn’t be too thrilled. Babies meant paid leave time. The company heads didn’t like paid leave time. She would tell them at some point. Eventually they would be able to tell by looking at her. Ethan finally returned upstairs. “What was that all about?” Clara asked. “Lulu saw a big spider and she tried to eat it.” He responded. “But she missed and it crawled up into her nose instead. She kinda freaked out.” “I would freak out too.” Clara shuddered. Ethan disappeared into the bathroom for a moment. She heard him use the bathroom, wash his hands, then brush his teeth. He emerged wearing nothing but his underwear. “Uh, did your adventure

Clara frowned. “Interesting.” She muttered, though the only one around to hear her was a sleepy Lulu. Clara reread the text for the eighth time. Unbeknownst to her, there had been a minor incident a few days ago that was normally within her purview as the Ice Witch. Their new friend from across the river, a town hero who called herself ‘Elmra Void’, had taken care of it when it became obvious Clara wasn’t showing up. Now Miss Void wanted to talk to her. But why? “You look perplexed.” Ethan said as he came down the stairs. “Did something happen?” “Uh, no. I got a text from the mayor’s assistant asking me to meet up with that Void chick at my earliest convenience.” “The hero for Mr. Mayor? Why?” “I don’t know.” “You’re on hiatus, this hero business it not your problem.” “It doesn’t sound like I’d be working with her or anything.” Clara said. “But I’m curious what she wants.” “I don’t know and I don’t care. I’m hungry.” Ethan clapped his hands together. Clara rolled her eyes. “When are

“And what has The Ice Witch really done for any of us?” Mayoral Candidate Hendricks shouted through the radio. “Aaron Zark, The Blue Bandit, was active for over a year before his death. And his final showdown? He trips and falls, killing himself with no help from our ‘beloved town hero’. It’s outrageous! The mayor has unleashed a vigilante crime fighter upon our fair city. When people get hurt, someone has to be held accountable. These so called supers or whatever they call themselves are lucky we don’t lock them up. They don’t deserve to be on our streets, let alone substituting themselves for our police force.” Clara rubbed her temples. “I’m sorry, would you mind turning that down? I’m getting a headache.” “Oh, sorry.” Michelle turned the radio off. “Thank you. I don’t mean to dictate what you do in your own car.” Clara said. “I really appreciate the lift.” “No problem. Besides, that guy gives me headaches too. I get being skeptical of superheroes, but really that guy just wants

Ethan finished cleaning the bathroom that wasn’t really dirty, then flipped the light off. He knew living in filth could be bad for one’s mental health, but sometimes he wondered if cleaning was good for you either. Before he could exit the bedroom, he heard a phone buzzing somewhere. He checked every draw until her found the little grey flip-phone. “Hey, Clara.” He hollered. “Is this your Ice Witch phone?” “What?” The phone stopped as Ethan walked out and leaned over the railing. “This phone, is it the one you get your superhero calls on?” Clara came over and looked up. “Yes, why do you have it?” It starting buzzing again. “You’re getting a call.” Clara cupped her hands and Ethan dropped the phone. “Hello?” She said. Ethan watched her eyebrows getting closer together as she listened. “Okay, I’ll be right there.” “Someone causing trouble?” Ethan asked. “I don’t know. There’s some kind of protest going on and they want me there in case something happens.” “What do they think’s gonna